Thursday, May 08, 2008

We Are Family

Me: Dude, what do you want from the US?
Cousin Bro (CB): Hmmmm...
Me: Should I get the Wii?
CB: No! Get me basketball shorts!
Me: Huh? One sec, I got you 4 basketball shorts last time.
CB: Man, they didnt have pockets! Can you get me basketball shorts with pockets?

Me: Ok, anything you want from here?
Mom: Ummm.... when we were in Walmart...
Me: OK! No Walmart. Anything but Walmart!
Mom: Arre... but those gloves I got from there, they were really nice!
Me: OK, tell me to get you perfumes! Body creams... shoes...
Mom: You get all that in India, Apoo. I couldnt find those gloves here!

Me: What do you want from USA? (in a slightly given up tired tone)
Aunt: You sound so tired. You come here and get married.
Me: I am tired of people not answering my questions! What do you want? I am pathetic at shopping stuff for you women, so please help before I end buying something stupid like a size 15 shoe!
Aunt: See, if you get married your wife will shop for all of us!
Me: I am getting you a handbag!
Aunt: No! Get me icebreakers!
Me: You get icebreakers in India right?
Aunt: You get everything in India, but get me icebreakers!

Me: What do you want from here?
Mama: Lets see! I dont have a laptop and I have been thinking of getting one.
Me: Now you talking! What config?
Mama: But then, I have a PC at home, a PC at work. I doubt I am going to log on in the train. Whats the use of a laptop? Do this, just gimme cash!

Me: Dad?
Dad: What time does your flight get here?
Me: What do you want from US?
Dad: Nothing beta, you come here!
Me: Do you realize the customs guy is going to be verrry disappointed when I walk through with empty bags?
Dad: Last time I was visiting you, I forgot my jeans there. Can you carry those?

If you work in the Bombay imigration/customs and see two empty bags pass through the scanner - its ME!

I'll be back home for two weeks starting May 10th. Anyone wanna hang around, just drop me an email.

Also, I fly out of my favorite Gujju airport. Newark, NJ. So if you are looking for an entertaining post, keep your fingers crossed that I find another iJalpa sitting next to me.

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Blogger Neeku said...

u going to India 8-) wow... me so Jealous .. haha... my family is the same... Whenever I call home to talk about school, job, internship, sari, jewellery, khakra refill, recipes..... the only solution to all my Talks.... is get married? Even for my backache they have a solution "Ibuprofen with a husband" ? eh!

Anyways, this time I am very positive... you will get some hot Marathi Chick sitting next to you... asking you " Kai Changla " (Means whats up ! Right!) might even ask you your number...Ah! and when you get back ... may be i will read post of you getting married :)

Okay! Have a safe and a fun trip And careful to not fall sick ! :)

May 08, 2008 1:17 PM  
Blogger Menagerie said...

Hmmph, I told you to carry my bag! The offer is still open, tell me quick, will overnight it !!!!

May 08, 2008 3:00 PM  
Anonymous Because of B said...

so you're getting bags for your family? :P

May 08, 2008 5:29 PM  
Anonymous IdeaSmith said...

Chocolates, Apoo. I'll never have enough of those. Two bags full will just about cut it for the two weeks. :-)

May 09, 2008 2:51 AM  
Blogger Iyer Education said...

if you havent already left from there could you adopt me as your cousin for the next two weeks and get me a wii...

i wouldnt want you to feel insulted with an empty bag... so please accept this as my humble contribution...

May 09, 2008 6:36 AM  
Blogger anjali said...

Ha. I love your mum already! :-)

May 09, 2008 6:44 AM  
Blogger Solitaire said...

Sounds like my family.
My mom will ask for things like croutons, bleach stick, etc.
I say good for me!! Saves me money and time!
Bon voyage!
Maybe the gujjuben you meet at the airport will be nice as me. :)

May 09, 2008 7:13 PM  
Blogger Over Rated said...

im sorry for the extremely bad joke ... but we do have empty bags in India too ...... :P :P ... i said im sorry ....

May 10, 2008 4:52 AM  
Anonymous saphire said...

he he...tell me about it...i have a huge collection of firangi-soft-toys from each time any of my frnds went on a trip abroad! :D

May 11, 2008 1:20 AM  
Blogger Still Searching said...

I totally agree with your mama! Why do you need a laptop in India?! Hmmm.. my bro usually has a long list when I go back from here... latest demand is the MacAir :))

May 11, 2008 8:35 PM  
Blogger KJ said...

why u did not ask me what i wanted :(

anyway u enjoi ur trip..

Looks like after Abs, now it is your turn .....




May 13, 2008 8:12 AM  
Blogger Tazeen said...

i actually came here to comment on your post but could not stop laughing at Neeku's "Ibuprofen with a husband" dilemma. I guess this is universal.

May 15, 2008 2:25 AM  
Blogger DewdropDream said...

My clan hasn't tried the 'Husband as universal solution' trick yet... perhaps because I appear far too weird and it's more than they can handle, trying to understand what issues a weirdo might have :P And next time you go home, buzz me for advice on gifts coz I got complimented for being a 'thoughtful gift giver' when I went home :)

May 15, 2008 11:31 AM  
Blogger Zee said...

ghar aaya pardesi tera des pukare tujhe..............

where have u been? or more like where have i been....hmmm...

u shud've also asked the blogger world what they want u know...just out of courtesy! hmph!

May 15, 2008 1:26 PM  
Anonymous Brad said...

IceBreakers! Huh?

May 22, 2008 12:10 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

Going to India without baggage! Incredible!
Can you do the same on the return?? This is where we need advice!!! Too many tasty treats and beautiful clothes to bring back let alone the cookery utensils that can't be found here!!

June 06, 2008 5:44 AM  
Blogger Priya Iyer said...

nice family.. :) hope u had a nice trip..

June 12, 2008 6:25 AM  

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