Where there is a "woof", there is a Dog

Didnt I mention before that I love dogs? And dogs love me? And this love is spread across cities, countries, continents.

My first day in USA I was chased by a dog who I would rather call a pony. He was too large for a dog. Fortunately no calamities. And then there is today. First off, this weekend traffic is crazy. What should be a 15 minute drive turns up being 40 minutes. Even after you leave work early to beat the rush. Then you get home and see a "past due" notice for your rent. You walk into the leasing office (which fortunately happens to be 30 secs away) and try to figure out what they mean by past due? Does it mean the same in USA?

"Sir, you gave us two money orders. One of $X and one of $Y and you still fall short by $19."

Heck, I always give one simple check. So I am asked to show some bank statement or something. Now that requires me to go to office and get a printout. So the matter is postponed to next week. I am sitting home, fuming, when the techy in me thinks my wireless signal would extend till the leasing office. I could show them the online statement on my laptop! So off I go with my laptop.

Did I mention that the apartment below mine has a dog. A black pomerenian (very similiar to the white ones you find in India - just paint them black). So as I walk out of my block Mr. Black Dog is sitting there with his master. First the eyes meet. Then there is a "woof". Now I have got reasonably good over time in interpreting dog language. I can distinguish one woof from the other. This woof was more of a "You dont annoy me yet, but who the heck are you?" woof. So the black canine comes and sniffs me all over. The owner is sitting on the lawn, smoking a cig. I am very close to peeing in my pants.

"Your dog okay?"

"He's okay. He aint do anything"

When Apoorva is around, do not predict dog behavior based on prior expereince. This chap was about to learn it the hard way.


To my surprise the dog allows me to go through without creating further ruckus. Ah, things have changed I thought. I enter the leasing office and tell her about showing the statement online.

"Oh, I need a copy. Need to send it to Godknowsthename land."

Damn, this just aint my day. So now I am walking back to my block, with laptop and all. Mr. Black Dog and Mr. Dog owner are still at the entrance. Now Black Dog runs up to me and stops right in front. And now I can read that look in his eyes. It says, "I need a bite of flesh." I could even predict what was coming up next. A low intensity "Grrrr..". Bang on target! I know these canines so well I thought. I could sense him eye my left leg. Up goes my left leg (yeah, langdii style). Then down goes my left leg and up comes my right leg. Now I know why Jamnabai Narsee School had 1 hour dedicated to Physical Training back in Grade VIII. Black Dog is barking all over alternating from one side to the other as per my leg movements. He is too close to outrun him. Finally I am jumping up and down and I think I managed to confuse the beast. Almost. I have to veer off topic here and tell you all that I am very proud of the fact that I managed to balance my laptop amidst all this.

Fortunately Black Dog owner saw my funny movements and caught hold of the beast. He was also helped by the fact I was shouting something like "Yo, Hello, Help!" The saga continues. Lucas Arts has decided to start a new series after the finale of star wars. This one is gonna be called Dog Wars. The first, no the last, oh, some part of the series is gonna be called "DOG WARS: Revenge of the Bitch."

But yes, one day I shall have my own dog! Someday....